Well, hello there, flist.



I accidentally went to my journal entries' page instead of my flist a minute ago and realized that I have not made many sober posts lately. This is only because I--for whatever reason--really enjoy sharing my drunken thoughts with the internet, and not because I am an alcoholic.

Recently, some things have happened in my life, some more interesting than others. I'll list them in order of increasing intrigue. (That word looks so fucked up to me right now and I don't know why.)

1. The shoe store I worked at turned into a skateboard shop. I do not skateboard, and after one day of attempting to answer questions about skateboarding and build skateboards for people who actually use them, both the manager and I decided I should move to the other Ann Arbor location and stick to shoes.

2. My internship has been extended into the Fall semester. On a smaller scale, but still, I'll be getting twelve dollars an hour, five hours a week, for creating a brand new tutoring system for the University of Michigan. That's going to look so bad ass on my resume. I'm also going to be a course assistant for a freshman writing class, for which I'm going to be paid nine fifty an hour. OH HELLS YEAH. I'm going to have three jobs in the fall, so I've decided that I'm going to take a trip after I graduate. Actually, that's pretty exciting. Let's move that to it's own number.

3. I'm going to take a trip after I graduate! Probably to Europe! Hopefully someone will be wiling and able to come with me.

4. I reread The Half-Blood Prince this week, mostly because I was really confused by the movie when the Weasley's house burned down. After reading the book again, I can for sure say that did not happen. Also I can say that I will apparently always cry when Dumbledore dies, and I can never read just one of those books without reading the rest of the series. So I'm embarking, for the zillionth time, on a (slightly out-of-order) Harry Potter reread.

5. Someone threw a bottle of Jim Beam through one of my windows. Let me repeat that, as your interest is probably waning at this point because even the more notable events in my life are generally pretty mundane and this is really the vital part of this here entry: SOMEONE THREW A BOTTLE OF JIM FUCKING BEAM THROUGH MY FUCKING WINDOW. I still haven't gotten all the glass cleaned up/out of my feet, and my landlord still hasn't replaced the window. They did at least put up a super ghetto plank of wood to protect me from the spiders and elements and asshats outside. This is the SECOND window that has been smashed. I don't know what the fuck this is. I'm going to start taking it personally if it happens again.

I was going to do that WIP meme that's been going around, but I think I'll save that for next time. I'll try to set a record and post two sober entries in a row. Right now I think I'll go watch some Weeds, as I've finally gotten around to watching the series in order. I did some research a few minutes ago and discovered that there are not many people online who ship Andy and Nancy. I don't understand how that's possible. AT ALL. I'm shipping them like crazy. Damnit, I want fic! And every time I see Andy I just want to do dirty things to him.

Ha, and on that note--

Also I just made this:



Obviously I am doing a lot of writing.

ETA: I'm trying really hard not to find and post a video of Logan and Ducan fighting after the boat-plugging comment. That scene cracks me up--probably one of the best Duncan moments, that's for sure. Right under his toast to Molly.

I'm watching Veronica Mars On Demand! (Silly, I know, since I have the DVDs, but that would require moving and I've had way too much Qdoba for that.) GOOD GOD I MISSED THIS SHOW. It's Normal Is the Watchword (aka not exactly the best episode ever aka I'm still mad about the whole Duncan/Logan do-si-do) and I'm still overjoyed to see these people on my television. LOL, Logan just sucker-kicked Weevil in the face. Has anyone ever made one of those GQMF things for Logan Echolls? That should happen.

Oh, Logan. I think I should conduct a poll! (Note: the obvious answer to the first question is "all the fucking time," so please go with your second choice.)

Poll #1417324 Things Lindsay Wants to Know
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 27

When is Logan hottest?

I need a new book to read. Any recommendations?

I don't think I've watched the entirety of this episode since it was on TV, because I never noticed that they actually show the witness dude on the bridge with Logan. I always thought he was just a blurry blob. So does this mean I was the only person who actually thought Dr. Griffith was the witness at first? Lol.

I'm feeling rather nostalgic right now. I kind of want to write some VM fic. I've got a million half-finished stories on my hard drive, maybe I should try to finish one. (I feel like I've typed that about a million times and never followed through, ugh.)

ETA: They did such a good job with the music on VM. GAH, I love so much about this show it's ridiculous.

Points of interest:

1. I didn't get anything lower than a B this semester! And now I'm on summer break!
2. My brother came to Ann Arbor yesterday and we hung out and had Indian food. It was a fun/funny day.
3. Skins is really, really fantastic.

I'm going home to Oxford today (the land of no internet), and then I'm flying to Florida on Wednesday to visit Autumn and sunshine and theme parks. Therefore, I don't know how much I'm going to be around for the next two weeks. Please, assure me that my plane won't crash and I won't die. This will be my third time on a plane and I'm kind of freaking out about it. At least I watched that special on Nightline a couple weeks ago and know the best ways to survive that sort of situation. I already made sure to get an aisle seat to improve my chances.

I saw I Love You, Man last night with Kiki. (We were in dire need of some Seth and Ryan Time.) It was pretty hilarious. I think I could easily and happily spend the rest of my days just watching Paul Rudd and Jason Segel hanging out. They're ridiculous together and I love it.

I'm gong home for Easter (yesssssss, Good Friday dinner at the Club!), which means that I'm going to miss the Doctor Who special. My mother cancelled the internet at home because my brother is an addict. So I guess I'm going to have to wait until next week to watch it, which really kind of sucks since I was rather looking forward to this one. The story seems like it could be pretty cool. I'm optimistic about this, despite my brain knowing better.

Ergo: I will be absent this weekend. So happy Easter and Passover and Doctor Who and whatever else you've got going on!

Earlier today, I thought I saw a cockroach in my bedroom. This seriously freaked me out. I've only encountered a cockroach once in my life (this summer at a McDonald's on Woodward. The thing was lying on its back just outside the door, twitching and I think in the process of dying). However, about five minutes ago I was just about to turn off my light and go to sleep when I spotted an enormous (seriously, like two inches long) brown smudge on my ceiling. I was like, AHHH, COCKROACH. But no--it was a centipede. Except it had a bazillion legs, so it was a BAZILLIONPEDE. So I stared at it, trying to summon up some murderous courage (knowing that if I tried to smoosh it into the ceiling it would inevitably fall in my hair and I would absolutely die). Just as I was about to make my move, the thing fell off the ceiling. I chased it with my shoe but it squeezed (seriously, ENORMOUS) under my bedroom door. When I followed it out to the hallway, there was nothing there. So I was like, "Centipede, hi. Look. I think we should try to be friends. I'll be nice to you if you'll be nice to me." (And that is in quotes because I did actually say it out loud, and also asked it to stay out of my closet.)

Except as soon as I see it again IT WILL DIE. Because I WILL KILL IT.

Mother fucker, I wanted to go to bed early tonight. Now I'm going to be on INFINITIPEDE patrol and I probably won't even be able to close my eyes. But at least it's not a cockroach. Although: are some centipedes poisonous? I think I remember hearing that they could be poisonous. Oh dear god. I will not rest until its unnatural life is snuffed out. (Ha, I watched Jaws today. I feel like there are some common themes going around.)

So in the past few months, I've suddenly gained an appreciation for "sitcoms"? Or at least television programming that lasts half an hour (with commercials) and happens to make me laugh until I snort. For example: Spaced and Asylum (both of which are unbelievably awesome and have elevated my Simon Pegg appreciation level from Respectful Love to Possibly Scary Obsession); Extras; Better off Ted; and, most recently (as in the past week and especially tonight), How I Met Your Mother. OH MY GOD IT IS SO GOOD I CAN'T STOP WATCHING. It is hilarious and surprisingly well-written (most of the time) and I actually adore every single character. I've even learned to ignore the laugh track. I got through almost the entirety of season two tonight and now my eyes hurt. BUT IT IS A GOOD SORT OF HAPPY HURT.

( A few BSG finale thoughts. )

I need to go to bed. My body seems to be having trouble responding to my brain's commands. I think it already went to sleep. But maybe I'll watch one more episode of HIMYM--it's not like I need to dance a jig or thumb wrestle to watch TV.

I'm reading Hamlet right now (well, not right now, obvs). To my absolute shock and surprise, I'm actually really enjoying it. Maybe it's just all the madness and angst and plotting? I don't know. But Bill, man, I've got to hand it to you: this is some good shit.

Anyway, I've interrupted my Shakespeare-ing because I need to share a thought I've been thinking:

I DO NOT WANT BSG TO BE OVER

DO IT! VOTE FOR TEN! YOUR VOTE COULD MAKE THE DIFFERENCE!

GO, DO YOUR CIVIC DUTY! There is no reason Seth Cohen should not win this battle. I mean, come on: HE'S SETH COHEN, PEOPLE.

(Hopefully one of these days I will actually get around to making a real post. Maybe that one with my thoughts about the DLM movie, partly because I promised, but mostly because I have to complain about it to someone.)

Thank you, Rachel Maddow, for providing me with the sort of news I actually care about:

 

Someone altered electronic signs intended to warn motorists of construction near the intersection of Lamar and Martin Luther King boulevards to warn drivers to "run" from the "zombies ahead."

"The end is near!!!!!!!!!" the signs exclaimed. "Caution! Zombies ahead!!!"

"Run for cold climates," the signs instructed motorists.

Okay, I'm just here because I had to share that with you guys. I have an esame d'italiano domani, so I need to prepare myself enough to get at least a C- (I'm taking it pass/fail, which I think is a pretty wise decision). But before I go, three more extremely vital things:

1. Slumdog Millionaire now owns 78% of my soul. I've seen every big Oscar contender (okay, except for The Wrestler), so I can say this with a decent amount of conviction: if Slumdog doesn't win best picture, I will stage a fucking coup. 

2. Zack and Miri Make a Porno is pretty hilarious.

3. THE MUSCLE ON THE BACK OF MY THIGH, I DON'T KNOW IT'S NAME, BUT IT'S SPAZZING THE FUCK OUT.

There isn't much to say that hasn't already been said. I just wanted to add my YEAH WAHOO! to the chorus of voices and also say that Rev. Joseph Lowery is pretty bad ass--I would go to church every week if he were my pastor. (Also, I just really wanted to post this picture because it made me laugh.)

Oh, and: I can't tell if I have a crush on Rahm Emanuel because he's attractive and funny or because he is now Josh Lyman in my mind.

FNL is just fucking perfect. The finale wasn't as good as the episode before it (but then again, there isn't much television that's better than that episode), but it was still pretty awesome. If this show gets cancelled I probably will stage a coup or die or something. 

Okay, as the above is pretty much a given, we're now to the real reason I'm posting:

( BSG spoilers BSG spoilers BSG SPOILERS! )

It is so cold I think my internal organs might be frozen.

I was going to post one of those 2008 reflection-type posts, but I didn't have time. Maybe tomorrow? I'm off to Kati's, where her parents are going to let us semi-illegally consume alcohol (legal on her part, illegal on mine). It should be amusing when my mother calls at midnight, as I'm not sure how good I am at pretending to be sober when I'm actually drunk. Generally when I'm faced with a situation in which that skill could come in handy, I duck in the closet. (And that is not a metaphor.) Aaaaanyway, the crux of this:

( Doctor Who )

So... remind me again why I was so excited about this episode? 

Happy [insert holiday]! And because it can't be Christmas without hearing this song at least once:



I'm waiting for my family to get ready so we can go to my grandparents' and then to various family members' homes. I bought a dress and shiny jacket thing from Forever 21 yesterday and can I just say: I look FIERCE.

I hope everyone's respective holidays are enjoyable, and that your family doesn't make you as insane as mine currently is. We're buried under about a foot and a half of snow, and the roads have been so bad the past few days that I haven't been able to hang out with any of my friends--only my family. As I'm sure you can imagine, that brings much joy to my heart.

This is probably the best part about Christmas: DOCTOR WHO TOMORROW DOCTOR WHO TOMORROW YAY YAY YAY!

P.S. Did you see Pav DOMINATE last night, Autumn? Hot damn!

Seriously, I'm writing my paper. I just need to share with you all two things that tickled me today:

1. The upcoming novel Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, which "features the original text of Jane Austen's beloved novel with all-new scenes of bone-crunching zombie action. As our story opens, a mysterious plague has fallen upon the quiet English village of Meryton—and the dead are returning to life! Feisty heroine Elizabeth Bennet is determined to wipe out the zombie menace, but she's soon distracted by the arrival of the haughty and arrogant Mr. Darcy. What ensues is a delightful comedy of manners with plenty of civilized sparring between the two young lovers—and even more violent sparring on the blood-soaked battlefield as Elizabeth wages war against hordes of flesh-eating undead. Complete with 20 illustrations in the style of C. E. Brock (the original illustrator of Pride and Prejudice), this insanely funny expanded edition will introduce Jane Austen's classic novel to new legions of fans."

I think I might just have to preorder that.

2.  University of Michigan investigates professor's involvement in prostitution case with law student. It's a bit tl;dr to post the whole thing here (although it is well worth the read), so I'll just give you a quick run-down of the best parts:

• the student was prostituting herself on Craigslist to help pay law school tution
• she "reluctantly agreed to allow Eliav [the professor] to strike her buttocks with a belt, but got upset when he slapped her in the face twice"
• "The rarity of how the case began - with a law student showing up at the police department's front desk to report she was assaulted while committing a crime herself-was not lost on investigators. "Perhaps she should have cracked a legal textbook before coming in to the police station to talk about this," Ann Arbor Detective Sgt. Richard Kinsey said."
• he paid her $300, which he insists was just a "token"
• he answered the add because he wanted to experiment sexually

My favorite part of all this, though, is I HAD THIS PROFESSOR FRESHMAN YEAR!!! KIKI AND I USED TO MAKE DIRTY JOKES ABOUT HIM BECAUSE WE FOUND HIM ATTRACTIVE, DESPITE THE FACT THAT HE IS NOT REALLY ALL THAT GOOD-LOOKING.

It's been a while since I've posted. Or since I've commented, or replied to comments, or even read my flist to any complete degree. I've even behind on all my shows. This is because school is insane, and it's making me loony, too.

Take, for instance, this email I just wrote to my mother, instead of writing an essay on Woolf's To the Lighthouse:

If you visit Sunday, please, please remember to bring that bug shield spray stuff. I've been cohabiting with ants and spiders and it's all making me very wiggly and paranoid. (Did you know that one of the definitions of cohabiting means living together in a sexual manner? Just so we're clear: I was not evoking that definition. More like the one that explains how every time I look anywhere there is some sort of creature with an exoskeleton creeping along on its unnatural number of legs and I have to battle the urge to call Dad and make him drive to Ann Arbor and kill it for me. There's this really weird species that seems native to my apartment--it looks like it's wearing yellow rubber shoes. And it's obviously a spider, but some of them only have seven legs. Sometimes I imagine that when they reach a certain age, they have this big ceremony and cut one of their legs off, to symbolize their manhood or whatever--like a Bar Mitzvah, just with amputation. Spiders are sinister and evil enough to put their children through that sort of thing, I think.)

I feel like the process of writing this paper might in fact be turning my brain to mush. I should really be working on it and yet, see how I'm writing a needlessly long-ish email to you instead of just going and writing the damn thing? I've been planning it for hours, using many sheets of scrap paper, because my brainstorming and pre-writing process happens to involve me writing out conversations with myself about my dumb ideas. I'm procrastinating because I've spent so much time talking to myself and planning it out that I'm almost unsure of how to get the actual paper rolling. I think I'm afraid I'm going to mess up my very brilliant ideas by translating them into academic English. If only I could just turn in all my paper scraps and let that be that. I'd just meet my professor in his office and throw them up in the air around him, like confetti, and shout, "I have had my vision! I lay down my brush in extreme fatigue!" (A sort of abridged, Lindsay-fied version of a line in the book I now, for some reason, know by heart and which will be extraordinarily appropriate if/when I finish the thing.) It could double as performance art. I could tour America and Canada, maybe even the United Kingdom. I'll be really popular in Finland, probably, with their endless cold and Viking heritage and president who's a woman but looks like Conan O'Brien (I wonder if her term's up by now). They're so nice and blond and cold, they'll think I'm a genius.

God. See this? You send me to college and I turn into a crazy person. You probably have no clue as to what I'm talking about right now. I say this because I don't think I really do and yet I'm the one typing it. I think I lost myself sometime around spider Bar Mitzvahs. Maybe I could take a copy of this email up to the free University mental health clinic and have them declare me temporarily insane so I don't have to write anything or take anymore tests. I mean, if that can get you off the hook for murders, why the heck can't it get you out of homework assignments? Our whole social and legal structure is obviously deeply flawed.

I stand by that last point. But do a lot of Finland citizens have Viking heritage? I should have a fact checker for my emails.

I'm not finished with exams until Wednesday, which is just torture for so many reasons, one of them being that from this point on, I can't watch anymore TWW. I am so obsessed with these characters and Josh/Donna that it is killing me inside to be away from them for that long. the_spin, yes, indeed, I would love some fic recs, and certainly as soon as I'm set free I will be bugging you for your finest.

I'm hoping next semester won't be as ridiculous as this one was. I'd like to actually be friendly with my friends list on a more-than-monthly basis. I like you guys, you know?

Happy (almost) Thanksgiving, my fellow prisoners American citizens! (I don't know what made me think of that right now but I'm sitting here cracking up. Seriously.)

I drove home today and was completely shocked: I live about an hour and a half from Ann Arbor. There is no snow on the ground in Ann Arbor. However, at my house, there are approximately FOUR INCHES OF SNOW on the ground. I SNOW SKATED with my brother. (Well, technically, I watched him snow skate, but the point remains.) I can't really understand this--which is probably why I always did awful in earth science, now that I think about it.

I was an extra in a movie last week! Some Rob Schneider thing--the director and producers and whatever kept calling it a ~film~ and I was like, dude, if it's Rob Schneider, it is definitely a movie--was filming on campus and so I skipped class and got to be filmed walking in and out of the League about fifteen times. So hopefully the back of my head won't get cut out. I was told to make an IMDB page and add myself as an uncredited extra, but that just makes me feel silly.

I made a sweet potato pie last night! With a real sweet potato! This might not be much of an accomplishment to most people, but for me, this is like scaling freaking Everest. Seriously. I fried a fork once--cooking is definitely not my forte. Hopefully it will actually be, you know, edible. (The pie, not the fork.)

And now I'm going to go watch The West Wing. Virginia got me hooked, mostly on Josh, particularly on Josh/Donna. I just thought I'd write up a quick post, since I haven't done so in a while, and wish my favorite flist a good Thanksgiving. Enjoy your favorite foodstuffs and forget about calories and try not to kill your families!